By Amal Ali & Sarah Rahimi
You know, it’s hard to write something powerful as a sister
Always raised to be seen, not heard
Sing like a bird, not roar like a lion
Be elegant, graceful, subtle, gentle, foundational
Never loud
Or at least not louder than the sounds of expectations speaking over us
It’s hard to say something powerful as a sister
At the risk of being too seductive, too provocative
Not feminine enough
And neglectful of expectations
Drawn by someone
Too insecure to hear me out
It’s hard to say something powerful as a sister
Because despite the fact that my hijab empowers me
My holy text endows me
And my deen elevates me
I can’t help but feel lesser
Because coming from a sister, my words fall on deaf ears
The prophetic example is exploited to silence me:
“We can’t be sexist, you have Khadija! And Aisha! And Fatima!”
Just like how racism can’t exist because our president is black, right?
But “hush, hush, hush, don’t talk about gendered violence
and microaggressions against women
Because Islam gave women all the rights they need,”
Just like how we don’t talk about how Muslim men
are discriminated against and oppressed in the West
since Islam gave them all the rights they need, right?
Our frustration is dismissed, and so I refuse to be silent
When I see yet another sister
Told to be strong, told to be sweet, told to let it go
And not cause any trouble
Islam is perfect, but Muslims are not
So while we put ourselves on a progressive pedestal
And pat ourselves on the back for eliminating sexism
Things are still happening
In the next 60 seconds, a woman will be assaulted
More likely by a man she trusted than a stranger
And by the way, it’s not just your drunk neighbor
It could be the brother praying next to you at jumaa
But we don’t talk about those things
In this pristine progressive Muslim community
In the next 24 hours, Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” (remember that song?)
Will receive 100,000 more views on YouTube
Some say music is halal
But there’s nothing zabiha about media normalizing rape
When was the last time you said you raped that video game
Or got raped by that exam?
The angels on your shoulders will remember it if you don’t
And I’m screaming these words at you
Because no one else can
Because I am privileged
And because the bruises I have are not on my skin
Covered with foundation
And explained by falling down a staircase
Or running into a door
Let me back it up if that’s too intense for you
There are no statistics for the sisters
Who will be fetishized and exotified
By a man who did not ask her permission
There are no statistics for the cat-calls and wolf-whistles
No statistics for the number of times a man has told me or one of my sisters
To be his “princess Jasmine”
It’s not just words
And it’s not a compliment or a joke
After I tell you to stop
Still too much? Let’s keep this going
There are no technical terms, no jargon
For a brother leading conversations and discussions
Receiving credit and praise for achievements
That the sisters surrounding him laid out
There is no support group for sisters
Whose hard work and efforts are disregarded
Because she is the voice of emotion, while he’s the voice of reason
There is no support group for sisters
Whose contributions and ideas
Go unrecognized
Because a brother repeated her suggestion in a deeper voice
Or brushed it off with a joke about sandwiches
Guess he needs the sisters to lay out creativity for him too
These words of mine will be dismissed
Because there are more important things to worry about
And don’t get me wrong
Because I ain’t down with human suffering
Including the suffering that doesn’t leave scars or paper trails
The suffering that socializes us to be passive
And is it not enough that
Jannah will be under our daughters’ feet
And they still won’t know their worth?
It’s hard to write something powerful as a sister
Even harder to speak it
But while this was a first step
There are many more steps to take
So every night, I pray to the Most Gracious, Most Merciful:
“Allahuma anta al Haqq, fa ansur al Haqq!”
“O Allah You are the Truth, so make the truth victorious”